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June 25, 2020

Many couples run their relationship on automatic. This can be fine but when troubles arise it can be very troublesome to know how to get the relationship back on track. Some might even start questioning what is this relationship about anyway. Some assume that if things...

November 28, 2018

To be truly able to handle a relationship we need personal skills that should be well developed by your mid 20s. These key skills are typically referred to as “maturity” and indicate that you can handle the challenges of being involved in a relationship. To be mature m...

February 6, 2018

A mountaineer’s guide to relationship success

To achieve the heights of what relationships have to offer you need to pack a bag for a long journey as there are many dangerous pathways and tricky sections to traverse.

You will ascend an easy pathway from the plains of sin...

January 5, 2018

I often see couples who are frustrated with each other because their expectations are not being met. But what is a reasonable expectation and what is not? Its hard if we are working from different assumptions about what we can legitimately expect in a relationship. Apa...

February 2, 2015


Sandra was furious. She had caught Tom checking her phone message once again. “ I just did it to reassure myself - its no big deal” Tom replied defensively. Is it a big deal?


In relationships the tendency or temptation to control is one of the most toxic forces that l...

February 2, 2015

“Oh my God  - this place is a pig sty!”     “You always leave your wet towels on the floor – I can’t stand it any more!”   How many fights start over household tidiness. It often appears to relationship counselors that couples are more concerned with hygiene than they...

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February 2, 2015

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The futile and fatal search for control

February 2, 2015

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